So long and Thanks for all the fish

Some people call it Taking a dump, sending a mail to Bondi or the private time, but no matter what you call it, what do you do when you at work or out the comfort of your own domain.

Personally I never want to put my arse anywhere near a publicly owned, bacteria infested bowl. We can lie to ourself that a few pieces of toilet paper will lean the plastic seat, but seriously do you really think that it will clean anything? And how about the people/stranger walking pass your cubicle while you are doing your business… doesn’t it just distract the shit out of you, no punt intended.

Public dumping is only performed when there is an emergency (Emergency index = Distance to closest toilet/Distance to own toilet * Number of Flatulence per minute). So this means that when public dumping occurs it is normally accompanied with some stereo action. Of course there is the fragrance that comes from the by-product, the lingering smell that never dissipates and becomes stronger as you walk away.

Also how about the poor by-standers who happen to stumble by. Who really wants to hear and smell the action coming from your cubicle?!